"She was wrong. Your job is to push people around, not run people around."
"That story should have the headline 'Wife stabs husband, police confirm it was justified.'"

"I made the straw into a dick."

"Nothin' but net."
"I don't even know what his face looks like. All I can see are his huge boobs."
"I think I am confusing 'opa!' with 'mazeltov?'"

California Bay Area Bachelorette / Wedding Week

*This trip will be portrayed only with slideshows and quotes.

"Owen found a penis in the freezer."
"I don't do anxiety pills. That's what whiskey is for."
"If I sober up, you hoes are done for."

All Around Oregon and Washington